Simran

******

I checked the clock for the hundredth time, perhaps, or maybe even more than that. Dad served the delicious dinner he had prepared. Ishaan Bhaiya, Adya Bhabhi, and Sonia were invited for dinner along with Niti and Arjun. Niti had arrived early, but Arjun was yet to arrive. And I was checking the time for his arrival only. He had to be there in five minutes, like he had told me seven minutes ago over the call.

But I had to rip the band-aid off, whether I did it with the documents Arjun was coming with or without them. I decided to tell them first and then show them the documents as proof as well. The documents in question were actually the legal papers in which I had sued my husband for emotional distress. I was going to drag my man to the court if needed.

"I want to say something..." Everyone's attention was on me. 

I glanced at their happy faces and felt guilty for doing it. I just had a beautiful reception a week ago where the world witnessed Kiaan Chauhan's love for his wife ... but the reality wasn't that beautiful. 

In reality, Simran Chauhan was an ignored wife, taken for granted by her husband, who promised her the world and yet ran away from her. 

It was time I removed the blindfold of the truth of our relationship from everyone's eyes. I shouldn't have been involving our families, but Kiaan left me no choice, and here I was putting some light on our relationship.

"What is it, Simmi?" Adya Bhabhi brought my attention back to the faces of everyone from my anxious but firm thoughts.

"Yes, beta, is everything okay? You look stressed..." Dad said.

Everybody looked a little worried now. It was all because my truth was dancing on my features shamelessly, so it was obvious everyone had already guessed there was something to be bothered about. Before I could even utter a word, I saw Arjun stepping to the meal table.

"He is here..." I took a breath of relief when Arjun eventually reached. Now I would simply hand over the papers to the family, and they would find out what I was planning without me telling them.

Niti cast a curious glance at him and then me when Arjun gave me the huge envelope of documents.

"What's in there?" 

Niti asked curiously. I wish I could tell my best friend first, but this wasn't something I should have waited for much longer. It was time to take proper action.

"A big change..." I whispered to her as she was beside me.

I handed the documents to Mom first. She took it from me, being curious, and then pulled the papers out of the envelope. It was hardly two papers, and I thought there would be more. But anyway, what did I know about legal papers, and all? I trusted Arjun with his work.

Mom and Dad stared at the documents together, along with Grandpa. They all looked shocked as they exchanged the same glances with each other.

"Simmi, is this true?" Mom asked.

I nodded, feeling sad because I was going to sue the son of the family.

"Okay, you guys are spiking my anxiety now..." 

Di said as she snatched the papers from Mom. Now she read the papers and then passed the shocking glance first to me and then to Mom, Dad, and grandpa.

"What the hell is going on?" 

Dhruv bhaiya was equally perturbed as he took the papers, and now everyone with him was checking out what was written on them.

Everybody shared a stunned, knowing look. I just ruined their peaceful dinner, and all I received was a pin-drop silence for a few moments. It made me anxious, too, even when I knew what was written on those documents.

All of a sudden, Mom and Dad stood up from their seats with smiling faces as they walked to me, feeling happy. Grandpa still looked bewildered, but also carried a small smile, sitting in the chair.

He didn't look very happy about it, but my observation had predicted something else. Now, everyone was smiling; they all held a genuine smile and not a phony one.

Wait! What was happening?

Grandpa should have been happy because he wanted Rhea and not me, and this might work in his favour, while Mom and Dad shouldn't have been happy at all. But things were the opposite.

What's going on?

Why is everybody smiling?

"Is this what you were stressed about? You shouldn't have been at all," Dad said, pulling me into a side hug. When he pulled back, Mom crushed me into her Mommy's warm hug, saying, "This nervousness happens to everything at this time."

What The Hell!!

I just sued their son, and they were happy about it? And how did they know everyone gets nervous while suing their husbands, as if they had done it too?

When Mom pulled back, Adya Bhabhi excitedly crushed me into another embrace, chirping, "Congratulations, my dear Simmi. Welcome to the club!"

Club of Suing Husbands?

Did that kind of club even exist?

One after the other, everyone hugged me, congratulated me, making my head spin, making me feel overwhelmed. I looked at Arjun, who appeared equally confused, as if he had no idea himself what the hell was going on.

Arjun had walked closer to me now.

"I didn't know Kiaan's family was this crazy..." He whispered to me while smiling at others.

I couldn't respond because I was just speechless. No one was making sense to me, neither my family nor Kiaan's.

Niti got to me last, making that fake angry face, crossing her arms in front of me.

"You didn't even tell your best friend first..." She paused and then smiled, ".....but still I am so so happy..."

When she hugged me, I stared helplessly at Arjun, who seemed as oblivious as I was to what was going on. When we pulled back from the hug, Arjun pulled her closer, holding her waist, lowered her voice so that only we could hear, and asked, "Baby, what's there to be happy about in those papers?"

"Jun...everything the reports say...." She replied excitedly.

"Reports?" He asked confusedly and then instantly grabbed the papers kept on the table. His mouth hung low in shock, and his eyes widened as if he was seeing those papers for the first time.

"Kiaan..." Di called out, surprised, staring behind me in shock.

I froze.  His aura, his fragrance, coiled me entirely. My heart beat quickened, my pulse fluttered, my nerves frayed.

He is here.

He is here.

He is here.

My heart chanted it with every beat like a religious slogan. 

And then, slowly, I turned around.

Everything felt like it was happening in slow motion for me. My heart thudded faster with every second. I could hear the pounding of my pulse in my ears, and every other voice had just faded.

I knew this wasn't a hoax anymore and that he was really there. 

When I completely turned to him, I saw him standing a few feet apart, looking as gorgeously handsome as before. Except that some things about his appearance weren't the same. 

His beard had grown, his eyes looked tired, his appearance was rugged, and he looked weary as if he had been burdened with so many responsibilities at once. His coat rested on his arm, his shirt's top two buttons were undone, his smile was genuine, but it carried an unspoken sadness.

And his clothes...they were from our reception.

He didn't look like the man who left me; instead looked like a broken one, as if I had left him.

I kept staring at him with that ache in my heart.

And when he looked at me...slowly, deliberately... whatever hatred I was harbouring just flushed out of my system, my breath knocked out and my knees...they felt weak...too weak for me to stand there and watch him looking at me me like it hurt for him to come closer and pull me in his arms, like he wore the sadness of me suing him.

He was talking to the others when they congratulated him for some reason. But his eyes...they never left me, didn't even blink. His gaze stayed on me, as if remembering what I looked like, as if analyzing whether I was the same as before, like I was still his, just as he had claimed me to be.

But...how would I have changed?

Main toh aaj bhi uski hi khooshbu mein lipti hui hu

[Even today, I remain wrapped in his fragrance.]

"You drove here after you got the news about Simmi?" He moved his gaze to Di, who asked her this question.

I finally breathed; the breath I had been holding went back inside me as I held the table's edges for support, otherwise I would have fallen.

Now I know why I sued him. I didn't sue him to drag him to court; instead, I sued him because I wanted him to drive across cities to get to me, to look at me like he was apologizing without even saying something, like I was his deity and he was my worshipper.

"Of course, he drove here after the news about Simmi. After this news, surely he wouldn't have been able to control himself from staying away from these two?" Mom replied with a question to Di's query.

Who two?

"Congratulations!!" Just like they hounded me, now they did the same with my husband. Weirdly, he was smiling.

Are they all crazy? Are they congratulating him for being sued?

Dad patted Kiaan's shoulder as he proudly said, "Welcome to the club, son, you are finally going to be a father." 

That instantly made me look up at him again. He only stared back, his poker face revealing nothing. I sauntered towards the papers on the table and picked them up. 

My mouth hung open because I wasn't seeing legal documents but medical reports. 

They were false pregnancy reports of mine.

Did Arjun do this?

I looked at Arjun, who gave me an apologetic look. Of course, he did it. Obviously, he called his friend and told him my plan, and turned the tables around in his best friend's favour. And there he was pretending he didn't know anything about it a few minutes ago.

God! Why did I trust him to support me here? I felt like a fool.

I was still fuming at Arjun, but he was making a puppy face now, holding Nitya as his shield. My best friend, however, had caught on that something was suspicious.

Kiaan and Arjun, the two peas in a pod, the two inseparable monkeys, just messed with me and made me their pawn.

"I couldn't be happier, couldn't stay away when I got the message from my wife." 

My eyes snapped up to my husband, who now held a smug expression on his face. He walked towards me, and my heart hammered like war drums.

"Congratulations, baby!" He murmured, and then he grabbed my wrist, pulled me to him, and hugged me.

I was a goner.

He dipped his face in the crook of my neck, his one hand resting on my waist, the other on my upper back. My face pressed to his chest as I breathed his scent. His heart was beating faster, similar to mine. He left a soft kiss on my neck, and I called his name to make him stop doing that in front of the family.

"Kiaan..." But it came out low, like a moan, which only he could hear. He pressed his hands harder on me.

"Don't..." He groaned.

"Don't you dare... call my name right now ... .Otherwise, I would fail to restrain myself."

He didn't say he wouldn't; instead, he said he would fail. 

Was he as miserable as I was?

Why did he put us in such a situation then?

When we pulled back, I saw his eyes pool with desire. He didn't sit beside me for dinner, but went to Ishaan Bhaiya. Both men were talking about something, sitting next to each other. I should have made a fuss, but I didn't. I wanted this distance too. One minute contact and my body was on fire, another surely would have turned me into ashes in front of everyone.

'But don't you want it?'

Why was my inner self always contradicting my wishes?

'Because deep down you want the same...deep down you want him.'

"Let's start dinner with the sweets ....after all, this is such good news..." Mom said, and then she put some gulab jamuns in a bowl and handed them to Kiaan, saying, "Kiaan, go feed this to her."

This time he sat beside me, because he had no choice now as Arjun sat beside Ishaan Bhaiya. He didn't feed me from a spoon; instead, he cut the gulab jamun in half and then gestured for me to part my lips. When I obliged, he put the gulab jamun inside my mouth, caressing my lips with his thumb.

While everyone clapped, not paying much attention, he dipped his thumb in his mouth, licking the chashni. I couldn't breathe for a moment as I watched him licking it off his thumb.

Someone coughed. It was Dhruv Bhaiya again. Saavi pinched his arm, blushing.

Why did Dhruv Bhaiya have to see that again?

"I am feeling hot..." Arjun muttered, sneering at us.

"Why, beta, the weather is nice today..." Mom replied.

"Don't worry, Aunty, it's not the weather's problem. That's how he is..." Niti fanned him with her palm, smirking at us in between.

Kiaan served me dinner and slid it towards me. It was an apt amount of everything, only a few spoonfuls, because after everything, I didn't have the appetite. Besides, I had already eaten out today with my academy friends, so I didn't feel hungry.

Everyone was busy eating, talking gleefully about two women being pregnant and the parties they would throw, but I wasn't fine. My breathing laboured. A restless tension settled inside me. I felt on edge, like something was about to snap, and I needed an anchor to hold myself firm.

I gripped the spoon tighter, holding a fake smile for everyone. 

Then all of a sudden, I felt his knuckles rubbing over my thigh. It glided softly, like I was delicate. His knuckles skated from my knee up to my thigh, and then he gave my thigh a small squeeze.

My heart sank low, towards the ground, down through my abdomen. The spoon fell on the plate, and the clinking sound echoed. My lips parted, and I felt I had never been told how to breathe.

"Simmi, what happened?" Grandpa asked, slightly concerned.

Worried and caring glances cast in my direction while I sat there breathless, speechless. And the worst part...his hand rested against my thigh, our skin separated only by the thin fabric of my saree.

"What happened, firely? Everything okay?" He whispered softly. No mischief in his voice or even his eyes.

I swallowed hard.

"I...yeah....spoon slipped."

Everyone's focus was back on some conversation, while mine was on how to free myself from the grip of a beast.

I had to do something to make him stop. 

So, I attempted to gently push his hand away, but he tightened his grip on mine, interlacing our fingers. And then our conjoined hands slid slightly higher on my thigh, resting dangerously close to where my thighs ended, and my core began.

My breath hitched sharply.

"Kiaan...you aren't eating anything..." Ishaan Bhaiya pointed out.

Now, how to tell him, Kiaan was too busy touching his wife under the table as if I was his dirty little secret.

'So, you want to be touched, openly?' My inner self taunted.

"How will the Thakur from Sholay eat?" Arjun teased, stuffing his mouth with a piece of gulab jamun and throwing a playful look in our direction. I felt embarrassed. 

He knew.

"What?" Adya Bhabhi asked, puzzled, her brows knitting together.

"I mean... I love Thakur from Sholay. Let's watch that movie after dinner..." Arjun said, trying hard to divert the topic after creating the mess himself.

But Nitya had caught a whiff that something was going on, so she turned into my lifesaver, steering everyone into another engaging discussion.

I took a breath of relief momentarily. 

"People are noticing..." I whispered to my husband on my left, pleadng him with my eyes to just leave my hand.

"Fuck the people. Tell me about you. Do you notice me, Jaan?"

Something in me twisted the way he called me, Jaan.

I was always Firefly, Simran, sweetheart, but never Jaan. Never. And now, when he called me that, my eyes filled with glistening tears.

How could just one word trap me like this? How could it make me lose a war he had started? How?

I looked away from him, making sure no one noticed the stray tear as I blinked it away. I wasn't fine. I didn't know how to be fine. I didn't even want to be fine.

I just wanted to be cherished, to be held with warmth. The way he called me his Jaan... I wanted to feel it too.

And there I was, calling him a hypocrite when I was no different, pushing him away while wanting him just as much.

"Dad made delicious pulao. It's waiting to be tasted..." I murmured, still unable to face him.

He didn't reply. And when I finally looked up, I found his gaze had darkened. He exhaled sharply, like he was holding himself back.

"I am craving you..." He murmured, his voice low and dangerous.

"Tell me... are you waiting for me? Waiting to be tasted?"

"I am not food," I said, weary of this argument, of us, of whatever this was that we kept circling and avoiding.

"No... You are not," he said softly. "You are my deepest, darkest desire... You're my undoing."

He suddenly rested his head on my shoulder, his face down now.

The entire family became spectators. They might not have heard what we were talking about, but they weren't blind to see it, nor emotionless to feel it.

No one said anything. They just watched here and there, avoiding looking in our direction.

It was better this way. I didn't want people to witness my destruction, my turmoil, my undoing: all because of one word. Jaan. All because of one man. My Husband.

Kiaan shut his eyes, his warm breath burning against the skin of my neck. He was clearly not interested in eating anything, and my appetite died too.

So I placed the spoon back on the plate, which I was holding like it was the last thread of my life, and just sat there, holding my husband's hand resting on my thigh, while he relaxed against my shoulder.

It felt like he had fought a battle for far too long, and my arms were his respite, where he finally let go. I didn't know what came over me. But something snapped inside me, like a restraint breaking, and I kissed his hair.

He didn't move. He just kept resting his head like that.

And when I realized what I had done in front of everyone, it was already too late.

Muttering under my breath, calling myself silly, I looked up at everyone, only to find them doing all the weird things one could do at a dinner table.

Arjun was talking to Gulabjamuns. Dhruv Bhaiya started counting the lights of the chandelier. Namit Jiju dipped his head into the phone like there was something he couldn't avoid.

Grandpa was talking to Tharki, who was sitting beside him on another chair. That was Tharki's fixed spot now.

Di and Adya were talking to each other animatedly, blushing. Saavi and Nitya were busy counting the rice on their plate.

Sonia was busy on her iPad while Ishaan Bhaiya was talking to Ikshit, making sure my nephew was not looking in our direction. 

And Mom and Dad...they were just smiling and eating, not acting like others.

"Can I just rest here for a while?" Kiaan mumbled against my skin with his eyes still closed, his lips brushing like he was chanting a prayer. I strengthened my grip on our interlaced fingers to ground myself.

"Let's watch a movie, guys!!"  Mom exclaimed.

"Yes, yes..movie..." Di said as she got up first, taking her plate with her.

"Yay!! Come on...." Arjun said next, and within the next moment, the only two left at the table were my husband and me.

Everyone took their plates and walked out. But then Arjun came back and filled his plate with more kheer and gulab jamun. No, he actually took the entire vessel of gulab jamun, leaving a small bowl behind.

Smiling sheepishly at me, he gestured and said, "You guys, please continue..."

Kiaan had no idea what was going on because he had actually slept. 

He looked peaceful, but exhausted, and my heart ached for him. It felt like he didn't get to rest all these nights when he was away. 

"Kiaan..." I called him softly.

"Hmmm..."

"You should sleep...."

"I am sleeping...." He replied.

"Kiaan...." I grabbed his shoulder as I shook him a little. He peeled his face away, and the distance burned my skin more than the contact ever did.

"Go to our room..." I said.

I found the moment to free my hands from his hold, and that's what I did. 

"Take some rest," I said, pushing myself off the chair and turning my back to him. I was going to be with the others, not him. I wasn't ready for him to manipulate me into another one of his lies, the ones he told all the time.

He didn't move an inch. Instead, what left his mouth wasn't agreement to my words, but a menacing warning that made my insides churn.

 "I want you in our room, in no more than ten minutes."

"I will go crazy if I can't have you right now."

******

The living room was filled with laughter, chaos, and fun-filled stories of Dad and Mom's past. Everyone mirrored their happiness, and it wasn't just about the past they talked about, but the babies on board. Mom was also narrating what all Dad did when she was pregnant and how she had wrapped Dad around her pinky finger.

My mind was elsewhere. It kept drifting towards that one warning and that one cry of saving.

'I want you in our room, in no more than ten minutes.'

'I  will go crazy if I can't have you right now.'

He left me with a warning, but also a plea for help, like he was drowning and I was his lifeline.

He had tortured me for weeks with this separation, and now he was here, demanding to be saved when I had nothing left to offer, when I was hollow myself. 

But I craved him too. When he hugged me, when he held me, I wanted to just shatter in his arms.

His touch made me feel alive after weeks, and I wanted him more than ever, but what about my dignity, my self-respect, the heartbreak? 

Was that all to be ignored now?

Those conflicting thoughts were tearing me apart from the inside. This push and pull between what my heart desired and what my mind demanded was dragging me toward an abyss I was too scared to step into.

But why was I the one who felt conflicted? 

Why was he the one making demands?

He should have been the one torn, the one struggling. Yet here I was: alone amidst family, while he wasn't even by my side.

"Simmi..." I felt a soft nudge on my shoulder and then saw everyone staring at me.

"Hmmm...what happened?" I asked Saavi, for she had pulled me out of my trance.

"Beta, you seem tired...go take some rest..."  Mom advised.

"Yeah, go have some rest..." Di added.

I didn't argue. I did need to take some rest, but tonight that was a far-fetched dream for me. 

I rose from the couch, tension coiling in my body. 

"Have fun!" everyone yelled in unison, laughing teasingly.

I gave them a small smile before heading in the direction of my room. Everyone assumed I was going to my bedroom. But I wasn't. Instead, I turned toward the dance room, because being in the same space as my husband tonight was something I was afraid of.

******

Ye haath mujhe de de Thakur 👀

Arjun and his obsession with Sholay 😂

Hi Lovelies,

I hope you all are doing great. 🤗

But is Simran doing great? 🤔

What about Kiaan? 🥹

What do you all think would happen in the next update? 🥹

Will they sort things out like a mature couple, or will there be an outburst? 🤔 

Whatever it is, you are not ready for it.🥹

Do share your views about the chapter. It would mean a lot to me. ❤️

P. S -> The next update will be on Wednesday. ❤️

Thanks,

Shrishtee