Shruti

******

"Sure, we will keep that in mind. Thanks, doctor." Namit said over the call.

I was comfortably resting in Dhriti's house, in her guest room. However, the word "comfortable" was not quite appropriate. It should have been forcefully comfortable. All because my best friend was too adamant about getting me to have some rest.

Namit walked closer to us when the call was over.

"We can have further check-ups in the coming week. For now, she advised you to take a rest. And your state is fine. Don't stress, okay." I nodded slightly after I heard him.

"How come we should not take the stress? She passed out at Rita's clinic."

"But Sama, she is fine now ."

"We'll find a new doctor for her."

Both Namit and Dhriti started bickering over the doctor's comment. It appeared I was their child, and they were my parents. I guess that is what I would have felt if my parents would have been alive. I could plainly picture how a family would behave around a sick kid. The longing for family crept inside my heart and sprawled its tentacles, trying to choke me.

"Sama, relax. We are here for her, sweetheart."

"I know. It's just...."

"If you keep stressing over, how will you be by Shruti's side as her pillar?"

I took the apple from the table and I yawned when the Khanna couple continued talking over what to do, and what to not. They were still going on with the to-do list of how they were going to take care of me when I interrupted the two.

"I think I should go to my place."

"NO," they said in unison. The one thing they ultimately agreed on was if I could go to my place or not.

"But I can't stay here."

"You are staying here. Leaving is not even an option." Dhriti was stern.

"I stand by her."

God! They were really synchronous over that decision. Neither of them took my side.

"You guys don't understand. This is my life and my issues, and it should be me who should handle all of it. What if I would have no friends? I would have been handling it all alone, won't I?" I sat Indian-style on the bed as I took another bite of the apple. Not a fan of apples yet I was devouring it as if it was my newfound elixir.

"But you have your friends with you. Then how could we let you suffer? Besides, you are not alone." Dhriti sat across from me on the bed and stared at my flat stomach for a little longer before she averted her gaze. I knew what she was feeling. I was aware of what she wanted my ultimate decision to be. Even when I knew Dhriti would always stand by my side no matter what I decide to do with the unborn baby, one part of her wanted me to comply with what her mind was already thinking of.

She wanted me to keep the baby.

******

I coiled my hair and made a bun out of it. I held it together with a brown clutcher before I picked up my phone from the bed. Like my old habit, I checked the notification bar. Sadly, it was empty. I was not important to anyone anymore. My significance to people was only because I was an heir to Saxena Enterprises.

Though a notification pop up out of the blue when I was reminiscing about old times, the times when I did not have time to even sleep, the good times when I was trying to cross every milestone to fulfill Dad's dream, which was to make Saxena Enterprises the biggest event management company the world has ever known.

I was yet to open the notification when one more popped up. Both of them were from the news app I used to keep on my phone all the time. My finger wanted to tap the notification, but as soon as I saw the three terms' The Royal Prince, I stopped. Suddenly, I recalled the brutal words that had cut me deeper than a knife, words that were like bullets that put cavernous holes in my soul.

'Your existence to me is the same as the light to a blind, sound to a deaf.'

Hatred mixed with pain seeped into my skin and I swiped away the notification instantly.

The news could have been about any royal prince the world had, but I did not want to take a chance. I could not let myself feel that gruesome pain again, so I opted to be cautious. I composed myself and inhaled deeply to calm my rage. After I was serene enough, I headed downstairs, holding my phone.

It was a Sunday evening. I stayed at my best friend's place for two days. Two days were more than enough. I felt rejuvenated and ready to be on my feet like always. I did not have to pack anything as I had used all of Dhriti's stuff for the two days, even the pair of undergarments which were brand new.

After I descended the staircase, I made my way to the kitchen because every Sunday evening the Khanna couple would be busy cooking together. It was a ritual they had been following for the past two years, which was to cook every Sunday if they would be at home. I had not for once seen them miss even one of it, even if they would have an argument or their mood would be sullen.

I guess those little things were the reasons for the strongest bond they shared.

While on my way, I heard a chorus of laughter coming toward me. When the kitchen came into my view, I smiled as I saw the love birds talking and laughing over something. I loved them. I really did. However, sometimes, my pining for a family would hover over me and make me feel insignificant, just like I was told about my existence by numerous people.

That I was worthless.

I cleared my throat to gain their attention. Once they turned to me, Dhriti was quick to analyze the situation.

"Where are you going?"

"I must head over to my place. And after that, I will go see Rita. She wanted to see me." I had received a text from Rita after my afternoon power nap broke in which she had mentioned she wanted to see me in urgency. She had emphasized there was something salient she needed to discuss. Rita was like an elder figure in my life. I won't say a mother, but somebody I would head to in case of dire situations once in a while. Only once in a while because life had taught me the hard way how to fend for myself and I hated to depend on others.

"Are you for real? You know the state. You are aware how these leeches are trying to find one good reason to tarnish your image and yet..." Dhriti walked to me, holding the wire whisk in her hand, looking like an enraged mother.

"It's been two days. There has not been a problem till now and I am completely fine, as stated by the doctor herself." Dhriti handed the whisk to Namit, removed her apron, and gave it to Namit as well to hold and walked to me, shaking her head in denial. I knew she was worried more because I was eventually famous for other reasons these days. I had become eminent as the Mystery Suicidal Girl, as someone had shot a video of me when I was standing on the terrace edge of the hospital. Though Namit had made sure my identity did not get revealed, he could not eradicate the existence of the video because before he could handle it, it was already too late.

"Give yourself a rest. I can't let you leave like that."

"I will be fine. I will take your car, the one you rarely use, to go to my place. And I also have my roomie, remember?" The mention of the car was important because I did not own any anymore after I lost all my fortunes to my namesake Uncle. And Dhriti was persistent in buying me a new car.

Also, after I was kicked out of my house and everything I owned was seized, I moved in with Simran, Dhriti's foster sister. She lived in a small two-bedroom apartment and the rent was not too high, so it was convenient. Besides, I was working as a secretary for a middle-aged woman in a small firm who did not know my identity, so money was not a major issue yet. Besides, I had my savings too.

"I will come with you."

"Don't make me feel like a prisoner. I get your concern, but you know I can handle things. I will be fine, I promise." I held both of her hands as I tried to assure her.

"Give me some time. Let me think through it. I want to decide what I want. Currently, I am very much jumbled." Dhriti seemed in thought and I looked over at Namit, who was standing behind her holding her apron and the whisk. I hoped he would come to my rescue.

"Dhri, let her go." Eventually, Namit came to my rescue.

"What about food? What will she eat?" She asked her husband.

"Pack something good for me for tonight. From tomorrow, I will follow the doctor's diet religiously myself. I promise."

She looked over at Namit, and he nodded. I could feel the ball was going to turn up in my court. So I added an extra, "Pleaseeee..."

"Fine. But If I get anxious, I will rush to you and bring you here with me."

"Yes, Mommy." I grinned, and she returned the gesture with a smile laced with concern.

"Wait, let me get some good food for you." Before she could head over to the kitchen once again, Namit's words had me appalled.

"Mark will be there at your service every day." I guess I was too early to even think he was going to side with me. I stared at him, horrified because I hated being watched by a bodyguard or anything like that. Because of my past and living with a mafia, there were certain things I abhorred. And being watched by someone topped the list.

"Don't give me that look. You did not possibly presume that I would just let you leave without ensuring your safety?" There was no point in arguing, so I stayed silent, but I knew I had to do something to get everything on track.

"Did I ever tell you how much I love you?" Dhriti asked Namit, being excessively elated by the fact I would be under Mark's scrutiny, their security team's head.

"I don't know. Did you?"

"I love you more than anything and everything." Dhriti kissed his cheek.

"I love you more, darling." Namit pecked her forehead before they went to the kitchen together to cook something for me.

I was actually doomed in more than one way. And I knew if I would not get a solution to my problems, I would suffer tragically.

******

Since I arrived at the cafe, which was situated in a remote region, Dr. Rita had not said a word about the important talk she indicated in the text. The place where the cafe was was a one-hour drive from where I was staying. Due to the area's sparse population, which would raise suspicions and put it under the radar of criminals looking to carry out dreadful acts, Mark was unwilling to take me there and was even refusing to let me leave alone. However, I knew how to handle certain situations and it was Rita who called me to the place, the woman I had known for years. She was the last elderly person left in my life. Despite the fact I had never asked Rita for life advice, I was confident that she would always be willing to lend a helping hand. Mark eventually consented to drive me there after much debate and a half-hour of persuading calls with Namit and Dhriti. He was seated just behind me at the table, on high alert, and prepared to attack anyone who even gave me a sidelong glance.

Rita wanted to have a quick discussion, and I presumed it would be related to my health. She had gone through my reports and the only matter to be discussed between us seemed to be that only. She was uptight and made awkward small talk, which didn't help. On top of that, the cafe's ambient scent made me nauseous.

"Look, Shruti."

"Was there anything else in the reports?" I suddenly inquired. My heart raced with worry. I wasn't prepared for another life-changing bombshell. The most recent ones were already disastrous. Adding one more to the list would cause mayhem.

"No, no, nothing like that. You are fine."

"What is it then? You seem stressed."

"You were always just like my daughter." I noticed when she used the word were rather than are.

"Even after what Alex or your brother did, I never left your side. I believed you to be different."

I could not comprehend her words completely. It would have been a lot simpler for me to understand those statements if they had come from some stranger. The nauseous feeling had become stronger with time.

She sighed as if what she was about to say was going to shred something or someone to pieces. The small cafe was chaotic, with baristas processing orders and chatty patrons making noise. Such chaos repulsed me and it only escalated my anxiety.

"I would ask you to stop seeing me or anyone from my family. I don't want your influence on my kids."

I don't want your influence on my kids.

I got a hint from that statement. I was aware of the concealed warning but chose to ignore it. To me, she was nothing less than family.

"What do you mean?" I asked politely. I felt dizzy, so I clutched the table rim firmly.

"Shruti, you are a wise woman. By now, you ought to have understood what I meant." Her speech came out like a furious tirade. She began keeping her wallet and phone in her handbag while saying something to herself. She was agitated, and I had the impression that I was suffocating her. My mood basically took a hit from everything, and I found myself out of control and irritated.

"State it clear, Mrs. Williams."

"What I am trying to say is, your way of living is way different from ours. We are a decent family, Shruti. And I don't want dirt on my family. So, I would rather have our contact severed." She said scornfully.

"And all of it because..."

"Because I am pregnant." I finished it for her.

"Pregnant with an illegitimate child." It should not have been her matter of concern. I respected her way too much and all of it dissipated down the drain at that very moment. 

"Enough, not a word about my baby." I kept a protective hand on my stomach.

"I know you will kill that unborn fetus. You have been brought to the streets and you have nothing to offer to that baby of yours."

"Oh, I would offer the world to my child. And I don't want to know where I stand or what I could offer to my baby to you."

Before she could spew any more venom, we heard a menacing voice.

"Is there any problem?"

Mark was standing closer to where Rita had been sitting. His one look had her shitting bricks.

Rita got up hurriedly and marched out of the cafe. Mark asked me to leave the cafe with him, but I was too numb to respond. Besides, my urge to throw up had intensified, so I followed the washroom sign with hastened steps. As soon as I bolted in, I began emptying the content of my stomach into the commode. My chest walls, the diaphragm, and the abdominal muscles contracted, and I kept going on and on until there was nothing left.

After I flushed, I got up and walked to the basin. I washed my face, which was teary. Strangely, I had not noticed that before. I believed the numbness had taken over control, making me incapable of even feeling my tears. I stared at my reflection keenly. I looked pale, worn out, and in pain.

It was not me. It was not the Shruti I knew. My goodwill, which by the way had very little left in me, did not do any good to me and gave the power to others to stomp on me. Everybody knew the world was a cruel place, and the universe would always create a certain situation as a reminder of that. My reminder was brutal but undeniable, which came in the form of backstabbing, by not one and not two, but a lot of people. I brushed my tears as I took deep breaths. I decided what I was going to do as I planned to have control of my life all to myself.

I was going to give birth. Because in the end, if anything I could call mine, was my child.